you gotta spar bro. put on your helmet, get your mouthpiece and really hit one another. you gotta get hit. my first fight i believe i lost because i didn't spar enough leading up. i went out with the wrong mentality from the onset and even when i had my guy hurt i didn't capitalize. when he had me though, he sure die. was a good lesson.
Yes. nobody wants to wear the headgear and big gloves. but if you do. then you can go all out. It may be hard to get all around mma training that way(wrestling and BJJ) but it is great for boxing and kickboxing.