Subsequently, Hollywood will mistake the whole thing for a futuristic retelling of "Of Mice and Men" and Jones will win an Oscar.
BonesKnows will be unable to visit the forum after this announcement as his keyboard will be glued into a single sheet of plastic and semen.
RD will be so upset that Jones wasn't taught humility that he'll go into a painkiller-induced waking coma where he witnesses Michael Bisping beat Silva, GSP, and Aldo in a single night - thus proving his theory that all three will lose their titles this year.
Sniggles will protest that it's all a distraction from the real robots, the ones the Republicans are sending into our schools to destroy learning.
I, ever the calm and thoughtful soul, will keep watch over the final seals of the apocalypse. (Ultimately letting down all of humanity when I go for a poop break because my stomach doesn't respect that whole "end of the world" thing.)